The Fed just cut rates, which means Jerome Powell finally admitted the economy is held together with vape smoke, AI capex, and Klarna payments for Taco Bell. This is the moment every boomer goldbug feared. The fire alarm has been pulled. The money printer is warming up like a jet engine in a Michael Bay movie. Bonds are about to get euthanized, real yields are hallucinations, and every asset manager in Manhattan is googling “how to buy Bitcoin at work without getting fired.” We are officially entering the God Candle Probability Zone. Bitcoin is about to do things that violate OSHA guidelines.